A couple years back, the first thing I did when I woke up was to plan my day and hope that it would be a great one. I started to realize that there were times in the late afternoon that this same hope had diminished considerably. At that time, I could not understand what had thrown me off track. Then one day, I started to hear how frequently people voiced negative comments without realizing the effect it had on me and others that were nearby. It surprised me to learn how their negative comments, even when they had nothing to do with me, could affect my mood and turn my day around. That didn’t seem fair to me that I would feel bad as I had not said or done anything to create negative emotions in me, and yet, they were there.
I realized that if other people’s negative statements could alter my day that I had to make changes in me. After all, I was responsible for my thoughts and moods. Maybe that person had a reason to feel the way they did, but I didn’t have to feel that way. My first resolution was to remind myself that I wanted to make sure that when I spoke with others that I would always make a point to replace negative comments with more positive and uplifting ones. I know that I didn’t want to infect somebody else’s spirit the way I had experienced.
What started to happen is that the positive statements that I made in every day conversation had set me up to have easier times with all areas of my life. Lucky me to realize that by being considerate to others how greatly I benefited. Things became even better when I started to insulate myself against other people’s negative statements that could sometimes come at me from all directions. I’m including newspapers, social media, and television into this mix.
Since emotions create thoughts, and thoughts turn into comments, I needed to reverse their effect as a way of self-preservation. Simply put, I had to deflect words before they could infect me. The best way to save yourself from damaging words is to use words of protection or more of an insulation. Here are a few that I use to help me in different situations.
I ask myself to remember that other people’s emotions are not my emotions.
I can offer empathy or even sympathy, but I release it when the conversation is over.
I want to remember that the way other people speak is not a reflection of my thoughts or beliefs.
If a friend or family member speaks in way that I may not agree that is their concern. I am not responsible for other people’s actions or reactions. I will not absorb negative comments.
I want to allow others to speak freely to me so that if they have something positive to say I can benefit.
I will recognize good intentions even if the delivery comes across in a negative way. A good intention should always trump the misuse of words.
Whatever words you choose to use, the best way to insulate yourself, is to use words of power. Words of power are words that create a good vibration. Keep the good ones handy, and let the other words go.